Can't Keep a Secret?

Secret Received

Hello and thanks for joining in! If you’re here, you’ll most likely have heard Can’t Keep A Secret – the show that discusses your secrets and decides whether to keep them safe forever, or let them loose on the world.

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Please leave your secret below – we don’t want any of your details, just your story – and then listen out to see if Joz and Ali discuss it. Don’t worry, they’ll be gentle.

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    Psst. Hi! I’m Joz, and this is Can’t Keep A Secret. Have you got something you’ve never really told anyone before? Something terrible you did that you try not to think about that much? Something wonderful you did that you kept secret because you didn’t want the attention? I’ve got one of each – I once shat myself as soon as I walked in through the door of my own flat; and I once saved my village from pirates but never told anyone it was me (full disclosure, that one’s a lie, can’t really think of anything for the second category, I’m not very good at doing nice things and then shutting up about it). Do you finally need the world to know of your secret kindnesses? Do you need forgiveness for your secret cruelties? We’ve all got these things in the attic, they knock around for years as we tie ourselves in knots over them, and a lot of the time, if we talk about them, we realise they didn’t matter that much after all. Often we find we run into a whole lot of very ordinary, very silly, very funny things about what it means to be human. So give us your secrets! It’s 100% anonymous, we’ll chat about them and explore them and then probably forgive you for them. We’d love to hear from you!
    HELLO I’M ALI. Oh, are we meant to whisper? Fine. I’ll try. I love secrets, although I find it hard to keep them, I ruined a surprise birthday party by immediately texting the birthday girl “Can’t wait to see you on the 12th!” To which she replied “What?” I think what I’m saying is I’ve got the honesty and integrity to handle your secrets with care and love, a bit like that B&Q employee who said the colour palette I was holding made me look haunted. To be fair, it did. I don’t have any secrets, I’m an open book, if the open book was stored in a cupboard filled with skeletons saying “What are you talking about Ali, stop lying”. So here we are ready to chat about your secrets, reveal our own along the way and maybe even get into the morality and psychology surrounding it all. If this podcast was a sandwich, your secrets will be the filling and Joz and I the soft, warm freshly baked baps cocooning them. Send us your secrets and we’ll take loving care of them. BYE FOR NOW.